September 15, 2022 Roundup
Family related news included a move, in the United States, toward marriage equality for people with disabilities, and a move towards permitting consensual sex between men in Singapore. Also in the news was a look at the staying power of Chapman's five love languages; a realization that there is a lack of support for how to parent adult children; and a look at another important aspect of domestic violence – litigation abuse.
Seeking Marriage Equality for People With Disabilities
Tammy La Gorce, The New York Times, Published, Aug. 25 Updated Sept. 1, 2022
When one partner is disabled and the other is not, getting married could mean giving up lifesaving health care and benefits from the government. Lori Long, a woman with a condition called ankylosing spondylitis, asserted that the marriage provisions are lodged in outdated ideas that have marginalized the disabled. “When they wrote the Social Security laws, they weren’t thinking that young people with disabilities would ever be marriage material,” she said.
The Sixth Love Language Does Not Exist
Alisha Haridasani Gupta, Illustrations by Luis Mazón, The New York Times, Published Aug. 27, 2022, Updated Aug. 29, 2022
The author of the seminal book on love languages, Gary Chapman, is surprised that the concept has become a cultural phenomenon. The five love languages are: words of affirmation (verbal compliments), quality time (doing something together and being focused in that moment), receiving gifts (anything from a spontaneous bouquet of flowers to more significant presents), acts of service (helping your partner with chores or cooking a meal) and physical touch (holding hands, sex and everything in between).
For Singapore’s Gay Men, Repeal of Sex Ban Brings Hope After Years of Pain
Sui-Lee Wee, The New York Times, August 30, 2022
The government in Singapore confirmed that it would get rid of the colonial-era law banning consensual sex between men. The moment was the result of years of activism and a growing acceptance of homosexuality. However, it is unclear when the repeal will take effect. Many gay men say they are now focused on healing from the years of pain caused by the law.
Domestic Violence In The Courtroom: The Legal System As A Weapon In Domestic Violence Cases
Patricia Fersch, Forbes, September 1, 2022 Litigation abuse is a means of keeping power and control over the victim by misusing the court system against the victim. Abusers use legal strategies to perpetrate abuse on victims even after a court issued an order of protection or a restraining order on behalf of the victim and even after custody is resolved by agreement or court order.
There Is No Road Map for the Longest Phase of Parenthood
Julie Halpert, The Atlantic, September 6, 2022
When a kid becomes an adult, a new, confusing stage of the parent-child relationship begins, yet there’s little guidance to help families navigate it.